Three weeks ago, deeply depressed and in a very dark place, I decided that I needed something. I didn’t know what that was. I knew only that in the past praying helped. It took me out of negative places and suicidal thoughts. So, I decided to pray, but not in the traditional format. I did some affirmative prayer.
I am worthy. I am lovable. I have friends. I am loved. The universe cares for me.
Immediately, I started to feel better. Seeing that it worked, I decided to go back to the literature where I learned about affirmative prayer.
Years ago, when I was doubting the Christian faith and still going to church, I came across the Silent Unity website. I wrote an e-mail to a Unity pastor, and he kindly mailed me some magazines. When I finally left the fundamentalist church I found a Unity church to go. But I couldn’t understand anything. They talked a lot about Jesus. But they didn’t worship Jesus or see him as a savior. They talked about god, but the god within them, not a god up in the clouds. I just couldn’t wrap my head around the teachings and the jargon: “We are all one,” “My higher self”, “I salute the divine within you.”
After trying for a year on and off, I declared it bullshit and left. However, the teaching did help me, at a psychological level. Saying the affirmations is a great way to change habits and help self-belief.
Now, years later, after having tried pure atheism for a few years, I find myself thirsty for something. Unity offers me something I can work with. It is imperfect. But it helps. And right now, I can use anything that will help. As well, I’m reading Religious Science literature, and other books, such as Tolle’s New Earth.
So, join me in this journey of self-made spirituality.